I enjoy some aspects and specific types of yard work (really) and today’s lesson is a discussion on my philosophical and scientific approach to the topic. I like to see, and get great satisfaction from, a freshly mown yard, the edge of a pond that has been neatly trimmed and a scenic view through the trees. That said I do have certain limitations and thus have come up with a structured way of accomplishing these tasks. The number one rule is to use my time in an efficient manner. My wife calls this particular philosophy "short cuts."

One of the primary reasons I am a fan of efficient time management with regard to yard work is that there must be sufficient opportunity left over to go hunting, fishing, play golf and pursue my multitude of hobbies. I think that this perspective makes a lot of sense.

Now you must understand that my pretty, talented spouse is a stickler for detail. In fact her attention to said detail is legendary if not historic in nature. Anything worth doing is worth spending all day on (even if it should only take a couple of hours) is her mantra. I think that viewpoint stinks like old bilge water. By the way she is out of town this week and won’t get to read this column otherwise I would phrase that criticism more delicately.

If I used her method it would take me weeks of back breaking labor to keep the yard in order. More importantly many fish would go uncaught, my golf handicap would skyrocket and I would very probably go into a deep, dark depression.

I’ve tried to give her my scientific explanation for efficient time management. It is based on the highly regarded Law of Diminishing Returns — an economic theory that has proved its worth over the course of centuries. It simply states that "In all productive processes adding one more factor of production, while holding all others constant will at some point yield lower per unit returns." Her succinct thought on that theory is that it "stinks like old bilge water" thus we are at an impasse on this topic.

So as I said she’s out of town but left me a list of things to do. These included edging the beds around the house in a suitably neat fashion and cutting down all low hanging branches between the house and the pond so that there would be an unobstructed view.

She estimated that it would take no more than a week to accomplish those tasks but after using the Law of Diminishing Returns to do my own computations I decided I could do it in a day. Needless to say I got her packed up and ushered off the premises before beginning the projects.

For the edging project she told me there was actually a machine I could go rent that would do a great job. My calculations and plans were somewhat different and with good reason. First of all I would have to get the tire on my trailer pumped up, haul it to town, pay a guy to rent a machine that I had no clue how to run, and then haul it back. I’m all for labor saving devices but in this case it would have resulted in a poor efficiency rating. As you have probably guessed I had a much better plan. I’d take my weed-eater, turn it up sideways and use that nifty little tool to do the edging. Half a day tops for that job and it would look just as good, be much cheaper and most importantly was a resourceful use of time.

For project number two I first considered letting nature take its course. What I mean is that it was the first day of fall and the leaves are fixing to start coming off the trees anyway. That would result in a gradual improvement of our view of the pond. Somehow I got the feeling that she was looking for instant gratification on the vista so I went to plan B. I started a low level burn down through the woods the ultimate goal of which was to clear out the foilage. Unfortunately it turned into a full blown conflagration that I was not able to contain. After the fire trucks got it put out I was able to see the pond quite satisfactorily.

I may have plugged in the wrong formula for the Law of Diminishing Returns on that one but no one said it’s perfect. I still got the jobs done in one day.

I’m not sure she’s going to like the results of my efforts but I was pretty happy myself. The beds were edged, the view was improved and I played golf the next day.

That’s the beauty of using science to enhance your time management and I highly recommend it.