The first funeral home fan that I remember (probably from the funeral of a great-aunt or uncle, my attendance at which, as a child of 4 or 5, would never in that time have been considered inappropriate) had a stock painting of Jesus as the Good Shepherd on the front. On the back would have been the name and address of the funeral home and a tasteful slogan along the lines of “Here when you need us” or “Treating your family like family for over 50 years.” In the years since, I’ve wondered about things like whether there were dyes in the first century to make robes such a deep shade of blue and such a rich shade of red, but back then my wondering was limited to how long I was going to have to wear the crinoline.