Strolling through my go-to grocery store the other day, I happened down the baby products aisle where I spied packages of toilet training pants featuring pictures of happy children who looked at least 3, some as old as 5. The first question that came to mind: Why would a 5-year-old who is continuing to eliminate on himself be happy? Perhaps a spokesperson for the unnamed manufacturer of said diabolical apparel will answer that question for me.