It will come as no great surprise to the regular readers of this column that I recently went on a fishing trip. Yep, I decided that weed-eating the North Forty, fertilizing the South Forty and vacuuming the Inside Forty could be put on hold in order to go in search of some big game fish or even some small game fish. For that matter, it wouldn’t have made any difference to me had we not boated a single scaly creature.
    It’s all about the adventure you know.
    On every out of town fishing trip that I’ve ever been on unexpected things happen. Sometimes one of the boys will catch a large beastly fish, other times someone will get a hook in a tender body part and occasionally one of my foolish partners will fall out of the boat into shark-infested waters. Nearly every time I myself will do something outlandish that falls outside the boundaries of normal.
    It’s just the nature of adventure on the high seas with the king of unfortunate and unlikely mishaps – me.
    Our destination on this particular expedition were the waters off of two luxurious spots on the Gulf of Mexico — namely Shell Point and Lanark Village. Both of these are mysterious places and their waters hold all manner of peculiar looking sea-going fishes. I know this to be true because on this excursion alone we counted at least fifteen different species of things that we hauled into the boat most of which I had never seen firsthand. I actually caught a squid and the little devil would squirt water right in your face if given the opportunity. I don’t know the names of the other critters but they kept me and my biologically challenged friends guessing throughout the trip. To cap the day off we also got lost — GPS notwithstanding. Not lost at sea but just couldn’t find how to get back where we started from. That was eventually remedied after some trial and error. Just in the nick of time too. A large thunderstorm was bearing down in our vicinity and we had a photo finish with it but eventually staggered home just ahead of the lightning bolts.
    We did catch some nice keepers on the trip. On our first day we caught a hefty batch of Spanish mackerel and those jokers are fast swimmers and hard pullers. Like bullets being shot through the water. The second day we were fortunate enough to come through with a nice mess of spotted seatrout and so we could claim a successful trip.
    On that second day one of my partners also caught a humongous cobia — sometimes referred to as a reef donkey — a well-earned nickname if I do say so. It took my boy about thirty minutes to land that twenty five pound load. I had the honor of netting his reef donkey and nearly messed it up. As things turned out the net bent and nearly broke while hauling the fighting behemoth aboard and had I lost it I’m sure my partner would have punched me in the jaw or pushed me overboard. Alas we got the fish aboard and he proceeded to tail whip everything in sight just adding a little more to the story.
    As is the norm I came through with my inevitable screw-up. We were staying at a friend’s house and they are in the process of selling it so there wasn’t much furniture in there. However a couch and a set of bunk beds were still on site so there was a place for each of us to sleep. Rodney, our notorious snorer was given the living room couch and Coach Cisson and myself had the bunk beds. I was assigned the top bunk. In the middle of the night I had to climb down the ladder to go to the bathroom and went down the ladder facing out. It was a strategic error. I had noticed before retiring that a large ceiling fan was right there beside the bed but in my sleepy state I simply forgot.
    I’m sure you can guess what happened next. Thwap, Thwap, Thwap went the fan blades on my head. Staggered but not knocked out I pulled my forehead out of harm’s way and made it to the bottom. When I got to the bathroom I turned on the light and a trickle of blood was running down my forehead so I had to do a little first aid on the spot. Washed it off with some water and put a bandage on it. The next morning I took a fair amount of grief from the boys but the long term ramifications of that fan beating was that I had a headache — that eventually turned into a sinus infection. I bet no one you know has ever had a sinus infection caused by a ceiling fan blade but I’m pretty sure that’s what caused mine.
    So if you are seeking a fun-loving outdoor escapade just look me up. I can always be counted on to go and to come through with an entertaining incident or two.
    Like I said it’s all about the adventure.