What in the devil is going out out there? The Tampa Bay Rays are going on — that’s what.
If you’re not quite the baseball enthusiast — heck, even if you are — flip through today’s sports section and check out who’s in first in the American League’s East Division. Yeah, the Tampa Bay Baseball Club.
For the past 10 years, since their inception, Tampa Bay has been a team mired in the basement of their own division. Never fully able to compete with the Big Two of Boston and New York, or even hang with Toronto and Baltimore, Tampa met each new season with hopes of finishing higher then last place.
What was the reasoning behind the atrocities in Tampa? Hmm... I don’t know... could it beeeee SATAN!
Sure, the baseball men will tell you the Rays stockpiled their farm system with quality pitchers, made crafty trades in years past for top prospects and hired the right people in the front office. But anyone with any sense sees only one viable reason for the change in fortune — the dropping of the word ‘Devil’ from the team name.
At the end of the 2007 season, Tampa Bay made a total transformation, ditching the purple and black uniforms of old and donning a new blue and white combo.
Instead of the Manta birostris, a frightening beast which has been terrorizing aquarium-goers for the ages, Tampa is now a symbolic image of the Florida sunshine.
“We are now the Rays,” said owner Stuart Sternberg at the time. “A beacon that radiates throughout Tampa Bay and across the entire state of Florida.”
Amen, brother Sternberg. Amen.
“It (the world Devil) was definitely part of the image problem,” vice-president of team marketing Tom Hoof told the The Star.com in April. “There were a lot of negative connotations and I’m not even talking about the religious ones.”
Oh modest man of moniker manipulation!
Through the ever-important focus group, the powers that be in Tampa Bay made the tough decision to drop — well I’m not going to say it again, lest I be smote.
Now, the Rays are certainly shining through to baseball’s center stage. And to help those of us who may not want to drop ol’ Lucifer’s second-calling, the Rays have set up an elaborate system of fines for anyone who shall forget the 11th commandment.
For those in the media, Rays president Matt Silverman tells ESPN’s Buster Olney he sends out a reminder letter and asking for a $1 donation which goes to charity. A nationwide collection plate if you will.
Rays players and personnel aren’t safe either, dishing out $10-$20 per reference to the old name. Which begs the question, if the Rays are so pious, shant they fine themselves for charity’s sake? To the theology department!
In closing, let us applaud the Tampa Bay franchise. Their new and bold thinking has done wonders for a once laughable squad. May the rest of the summer be filled with the mystique that is Rays baseball.
My own Devilish record: still 16-23.
If you’re not quite the baseball enthusiast — heck, even if you are — flip through today’s sports section and check out who’s in first in the American League’s East Division. Yeah, the Tampa Bay Baseball Club.
For the past 10 years, since their inception, Tampa Bay has been a team mired in the basement of their own division. Never fully able to compete with the Big Two of Boston and New York, or even hang with Toronto and Baltimore, Tampa met each new season with hopes of finishing higher then last place.
What was the reasoning behind the atrocities in Tampa? Hmm... I don’t know... could it beeeee SATAN!
Sure, the baseball men will tell you the Rays stockpiled their farm system with quality pitchers, made crafty trades in years past for top prospects and hired the right people in the front office. But anyone with any sense sees only one viable reason for the change in fortune — the dropping of the word ‘Devil’ from the team name.
At the end of the 2007 season, Tampa Bay made a total transformation, ditching the purple and black uniforms of old and donning a new blue and white combo.
Instead of the Manta birostris, a frightening beast which has been terrorizing aquarium-goers for the ages, Tampa is now a symbolic image of the Florida sunshine.
“We are now the Rays,” said owner Stuart Sternberg at the time. “A beacon that radiates throughout Tampa Bay and across the entire state of Florida.”
Amen, brother Sternberg. Amen.
“It (the world Devil) was definitely part of the image problem,” vice-president of team marketing Tom Hoof told the The Star.com in April. “There were a lot of negative connotations and I’m not even talking about the religious ones.”
Oh modest man of moniker manipulation!
Through the ever-important focus group, the powers that be in Tampa Bay made the tough decision to drop — well I’m not going to say it again, lest I be smote.
Now, the Rays are certainly shining through to baseball’s center stage. And to help those of us who may not want to drop ol’ Lucifer’s second-calling, the Rays have set up an elaborate system of fines for anyone who shall forget the 11th commandment.
For those in the media, Rays president Matt Silverman tells ESPN’s Buster Olney he sends out a reminder letter and asking for a $1 donation which goes to charity. A nationwide collection plate if you will.
Rays players and personnel aren’t safe either, dishing out $10-$20 per reference to the old name. Which begs the question, if the Rays are so pious, shant they fine themselves for charity’s sake? To the theology department!
In closing, let us applaud the Tampa Bay franchise. Their new and bold thinking has done wonders for a once laughable squad. May the rest of the summer be filled with the mystique that is Rays baseball.
My own Devilish record: still 16-23.
